July 8, 2018

logoInvited to Church

Saturday morning

My grandparents invited me to church tomorrow. With everything related to my hospitalization and legal troubles they thought that I needed some Jesus. I must admit that I was hesitant at first to go but I think it would look good to my probation officer.

A few weeks ago, I was having a pretty bad time and everyone decided to gang up on me and got me arrested. I then got blackmailed into being forced to take these horrible psych drugs that I have decided sucks. I even got to report every week and do tests to make sure drugs are still in my system. I really didn’t want to go to prison so I just gave in to what everyone told me to do. My grandparents offered to let me be their responsibility since no one else wanted to say that I could come back to their place if I was released. I think I upset them too much with what happened.

I decided that I didn’t need the friends that turned on me or my parents that disowned me. I’ve always had a great relationship with my grandparents and I think they probably felt sorry for me. I’m going to try and do right by them as they seem to actually care. These meds make me kind of a zombie. Soon I’ll figure out a way around the tests. I hate being afraid, so I guess I’ll have to go to church. I will post something tomorrow about how it went.

Sunday morning

Church services were a lot more tolerable than I had expected. Still a little typical when it comes to Baptists. I didn’t think that there would even be much to talk about except I met a couple of really interesting people there who invited me to some other church events.

The church is a decent size with room for about 600-700 people. It is one of the larger churches in the small town that I am in as nearly everyone goes to this one. I met a few people who I seemed to get along with as they invited me to visit one of their midweek events. I am hesitant to go but my grandparents are encouraging me, they tell me that it’ll help with my isolation. I don’t think I isolate that badly but they say I need friends. I’ve lost a lot of my friends lately. I use the word friends lightly here because they really weren’t my friends. They got me in serious trouble by using my words against me.

I guess the last few weeks have made me think a lot about how important it is to have people I get along with. Too much of my life I’ve had to fight with people who think way differently than me. I guess its every important person’s curse to experience this at sometime in their life. I didn’t know yesterday if I wanted to go to church today and now I am feeling the same about Wednesday.

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